Managing Back to School Anxiety for Parents and Kids

The start of the school year can be exciting and anxiety-provoking. Summer is typically a more carefree, non-demanding season compared to the school year and it can take some time to adjust to being back at school. The adjustment may be particularly challenging if there is a larger change such as starting at a new school or a close friend no longer being in the same class. 

Parents often feel pressure as the school year begins – wrangling kids up and out the door in the morning, having more activities on the calendar, and helping with homework. Typically, back-to-school anxiety will lessen with time as parents, kids, and students in general get used to the schedule and the daily rhythm. Nonetheless, it can be helpful to pause and check in with yourself.

If you are feeling stressed, consider small and realistic steps you can take to help yourself feel calmer and more grounded and to potentially project less stress on to those around you. Scheduling a weekly walk with a friend, practicing a few minutes of slow breathing, or getting up a few minutes earlier to have some time to yourself before the day begins, are all great ways to calm the nervous system.

Try Not to Overschedule

Try to be mindful of how many commitments you are taking on. It can be easy to add more and more things to your plate or not want yourself or your child to miss out on an experience. Yet, there are only so many hours in the day, and being consistently overscheduled can increase stress and anxiety.

Having said that, a balanced structure and routine helps manage anxiety. If you are lacking a routine, start with a small change that you think may help increase your sense of well-being or help you feel more settled and organized. For example, picking out your clothes for the next day the night before and laying them out may save you some time and help you feel less rushed in the morning; aiming for a more consistent bedtime for yourself or your children is also a helpful place to start.

Additional Tips for Managing Back-to-School Anxiety

For more ways to deal with the first-day-of-class jitters and all the tasks and activities that will be added to your schedule, here are four tips:

1. Acknowledge and validate anxiety

For example, if your child mentions concern about who they may sit with at lunch, you may say, “It sounds like you are feeling worried about not having anyone to sit with at lunch. I get that. It feels scary to be around new people.”

Also, internally acknowledge any anxiety you may be feeling with a kind and compassionate inner tone of voice: “It makes sense that I’m feeling anxious. A lot is going on right now.”

2. Approach rather than avoid anxiety

It is natural to avoid situations that provoke anxiety. Yet, doing so increases anxiety over time and diminishes your sense of capability and confidence. So, plan out realistic steps you can take to approach anxiety and help your kids do the same.

For example, if your child is worried about not having anyone to sit with at lunch, ask if they want to schedule a play date with a person in their class so they can get to know their classmates better.

Or, if you are anxious about the mounting tasks on your calendar and are feeling the urge to avoid them altogether, block out 15 to 20 minutes to sit down and prioritize weekly tasks and address a piece of an important task.

3. Remind yourself of what you like about this time of year

Fall can be a stressful time, yet it also brings possibility, coziness, and a sense of festivity. Perhaps you like the weather turning a bit cooler, the anticipation of crisp leaves on the ground, or sipping a seasonal drink.

Make a list of enjoyable activities you want to do this fall – going apple picking, visiting a pumpkin patch or corn maze, taking a hike to view the autumn colors, etc.

4. Spend time outside

Summer goes hand-in-hand with fun in the sun and time outdoors. Sunlight and fresh air boost mood and as fall approaches, you may spend more time indoors which may diminish mood over time. So, be intentional about getting outside.

Take a brief morning or evening walk or stand outside with your face turned toward the sun for a few minutes in the morning.

This article from Verywell Mind provides additional tips and resources.

And, to learn more about managing back-to-school anxiety, and anxiety in general, don’t hesitate to contact us at CBT Denver.