How to Practice Self-Care During the Holidays

Self-care is probably not the first thing that comes to mind when thinking about the holiday season. It tends to be a busy and stressful time of year that may include many social gatherings, travel, and perhaps tighter finances. The holidays can also bring on increased levels of mental health issues such as anxiety and depression for a variety of reasons including chronic stress, navigating challenging interpersonal dynamics, or grief related to the death of a loved one. This is why it is important to find ways to engage in self-care this holiday season by refilling your cup.

There is no set formula for self-care. It varies based on what is nurturing to you. So, step one is to pause and ask yourself how you define it. Does it feel calming to carve out time to read a book, go for a jog, work on a jigsaw puzzle, or find a few quiet minutes during the day to have a cup of tea? There is no right or wrong answer. 

This NYT article discusses the idea of a “holiday preset” or prioritizing self-care before the holiday season gets into full swing. Even when the holidays have already begun, it is never too late to make time for yourself, and maybe the article will remind you of the importance of putting yourself first.

A recent poll by the American Psychiatric Association (APA) found that about a third of Americans anticipate being more stressed this holiday season compared to last year. A key component of stress is having unrealistic and rigid expectations around the holidays and putting pressure on yourself to ensure the season unfolds in a certain way. Rigid expectations can fuel self-criticism and disconnect you from the moments of joy these days can bring. So be realistic: perfection does not exist. A gathering can be as hectic as it can be fun. Remember, you are human and the holidays are imperfect.

It is also helpful to plan ahead, when possible. Think about your specific holiday stressors. Is it stressful for you to look for holiday gifts or plan big meals? Once you know what your specific triggerts are, you can plan for them. Perhaps you can delegate certain tasks to others, break larger tasks into smaller pieces, or find ways to save time on some chores. You might consider ordering prepared food instead of cooking an entire meal, for example.

The APA has outlined some helpful holiday coping strategies in this article including practicing saying no, taking breaks, and spending time outside. A major barrier to practicing self-care is a lack of time. It can feel like adding one more task to an already long list of to-dos when time is limited. Thus, it is beneficial to remember that small acts of self-care add up to a larger impact. A 10-minute walk outside or simply pausing to take 5 to 10 mindful breaths can go a long way. Sure, a week-long beach vacation may sound nice, but that’s not necessarily doable. Little acts of self-care, however, are.

The holiday season can also be a time of year when grief and loss are intensified. A time when the absence of a loved one feels more pronounced. And, sometimes we are overwhelmed by guilt related to feeling sad or depressed. We learn from a young age that the holidays are supposed to be a magical time and it can feel like we are doing things wrong – like something is wrong with us – if they don’t feel that way.

It is easy to criticize and judge our feelings. Instead, see if you can simply name them without adding judgment. Practice acknowledging and accepting your feelings. “I am feeling sad today” or “Right now, I am feeling excited and stressed.”

To learn more about self-care strategies around the holidays, or any time of year, please contact us at CBT Denver.